May. 11th, 2017

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As we know, we’re about to spend the next decade or so watching Lizzie walk down the same self-defeating path Elly does when she tries to make sense of a world where no one lets her trade on her looks quite like Trash Bag Johnny does. She got a lot of mileage outta pretty much flirting with her dad but when she got out into the world, no one would let her get away with shit because she was cute. Rather than admit that John was an anomaly and that she actually had to bring stuff to the table, she’d convinced herself that no one likes her because she’s got a big flaw that makes her ugly and unworthy. The strip that comes closest to proving my point is the one where she seemed to have actively sought out someone who’d mock her for having her hair all braided up so it would confirm her belief that no one really liked her.

Ordinarily, this would be the part where I talk about how it’s also her mind’s eye that’s myopic because she spent so much time on that damned fantasy island in her head that she never bothered figuring out exactly how the real world worked. Today, I'd like to talk about the heaping helping of hypocrisy Liz seems to have forgotten that she saw when Mommy talked a good game about how people like you for you only to turn around and spout her loony gospel about how suddenly, after years of being okay with the woman in the mirror, she’s old and grey and fat and her life was like literally OVER before it had begun. It’s like watching the public information film that has the drug addict boy tell his dad he learned being a dope fiend from said dad. The Yank had a shocked look on his face because he realized the truth in the anvilicious slogan. Elly would deny that Liz learned that girls just wanna fret about their looks from her because nothing bad is her fault.

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