Blonde Lack-of-Ambition.

[dreadedcandiru2]

As we know, Lynn seems to be at pains to avoid admitting that Lizardbreath isn't a very accurate portrait of Kate either in temperament or appearance. Instead of the passive, fair-haired girly-girl who was content to cling to Mommy's leg like a leech and let Mommy dress her up like a little doll and make Mommy look good, Katie seems to have been a tomboyish brunette who really didn't much care for Mommy's efforts to make her pretty. Despite her latest attempt to deny the bleeding obvious, we're left with the impression that Lynn actually did make a caricature of the real Kate and that said caricature is the picky-faced Martian princess April.

We're also left with the impression that that Lynn has a strong unconscious need to hate brunettes and love blondes. It seems to me that the reason why Connie stopped being an antagonistic jerk and why Lynn abandoned her plan to make Susan a threat to Elly's marriage is that she simply cannot bring herself to hate women with fair hair. The reason seems to me that she associates lighter-colored hair with a redeeming passivity that doesn't threaten Ellythe Pattersons by exposing them to the challengethreat of genuine competionfamily politics. Becky, it would seem, proves the rule by acting out because she has a broken home; once she started to get away from her evil parents, she started to realize that she was too good for her own good and was thus wonderful again.

As for dark-haired women, the only good one is Georgia because she freed Phil from his nomadic lifestyle and playing discordant noise that Elly couldn't sing along tonobody actually liked. Evil Therese is evil because she doesn't want to admit that Liz has every right to intrude on her personal space because she's too God-damned clingy, passive and stupid to move on with her lifeshe needs to learn to trust again and the Martian is bad because she ruined Elly's life.

While it might seem that she's profiling people because a brunette got more action than she did or because Alan is a brunette and won their childhood by 'cheating', the explanation might be even more simple. All we have to do is find out what color her mother's hair was.

Comments

[josephusrex.livejournal.com]

Plus it's more than likely that she grew up on fairy tales in which the good princess was fair and the bad princess was dark. They were all like that. I was five years old but old enough to find it disturbing.

It gets worse........

[dreadedcandiru2.livejournal.com]

What's more disturbing is how ready I am to consider that Lynn is still thinking like a five year old. You would think that a grown woman would realize that fairy tales aren't real but she only seems to have grown larger and older. We are dealing with someone who will go from her first childhood to her second without the intervening period of maturity that others go through.

[(Anonymous)]

I suppose it's no coincidence that Anthony divorced the Evil Dark-Haired Woman Therese and married the Fair-Haired Elizabeth the Good-Hearted, then, is it?

(also note Deanna's hair color)

[dreadedcandiru2.livejournal.com]

Nor is it a surprise that the spoiled, picky-faced Martian creature ran away to the little cow town of Calgary like the ungrateful princess she is instead of marrying Gerund and popping out grandbabies for Elly to neglect.

[megan-koumori.livejournal.com]

Personally, I've always preferred dark hair to blonde, even as a child.

[dreadedcandiru2.livejournal.com]

I know what you mean. Unlike Lynn, I feel more comfortable in the presence of people I can relate to.